As you know i am a counselor who counsels teens; i just did a radio interview with a local news radio station and was asked this question, "should parents themselves be involved in the counseling process?" by the interviewer. I thought it was an excellent question to ask but nonetheless a disturbing question to ponder as well. When a parent is involved in a counseling scenario, is the parent:

a) eager to stand side-by-side with the child and understand the journey they are taking?

b) quick to set up diversion signs and get the child 'on the right path'?

c) get as much information about the child and use it as ammunition in future confrontations?

I really hope parents would choose choice (a). We need to have more parents who want to understand the cultural, emotional and psychological landscape their children have been planted in. I'm not advocating that parents be experts; indeed no one is an expert. We need parents who make time to understand their children....understand and know their child. Time.....now that's where the difficulty arises. Making time for their children....

May I suggest a few simple steps you can take to 'make time' for your child?

• cook his/her favourite meal and have it ready som that both of you can have time together


• get him/her to book a ticket to a good movie of their choice, watch and be curious


• play computer games together....dad and mum can be 'kwel' (cool) too!


• Get involved in their homework...not to check but to encourage them along


• praise them, affirm them, praise them!

SELAH